“I Can Hear You.” by Copper D.W
“I find it interesting, you know?” I looked at Ally and she just shook her head.
“Well, it almost seems that I know what you know and what I know you don’t…”
Ally just shook her head again and signed I still don’t understand.
I sighed. I knew I had to explain more, but I hated talking, and I hadn’t yet mastered American sign Language. Most people thought I couldn’t speak either.
“Ok, Ally it’s just like… sometimes I know what you’re thinking” She gave me a confused face. Like by reading body language? She signed to me. “No… umm, not really. It’s kind of like… I can read your thoughts…” Ally just looked at me blankly. “You know I hate it when you do that.” Ok, then what am I thinking now?
“I can’t just turn it on and off like that,” I tried to explain, “it’s kind of like when there is something important to say, I just know what you’re thinking.”
Do you realize that my facial expressions are more dynamic because I can’t talk right? “I know,” I said. “Ok, umm remember the yesterday? We were at a party?”
Yes, I remember, I was there, it was yesterday and that is the sole reason why we are stuck here right now. “Yeah… well, I was in the washroom and I heard you yell.”
Yell? Umm, Gerami I’m pretty sure you’re aware of this, but just to point it out but I don’t talk let alone yell. “I know, umm, it’s kind of complicated to explain.”
Well, we have time Ally signed gesturing to the room we were locked in. “Yeah, sorry about that” I muttered.
There was a moment of awkward silence and I started to look at my bruised hands only to realize that Ally was signing me again. “Oh sorry,” I said as I looked to see what she was signing. How did you know I was yelling? She signed. Well at least yelling in my mind? “I don’t know… it’s weird isn’t it?”
She stopped to collect her thoughts. Well, at least you intervened at the right time, even though you still had toilet paper in your pants. She laughed her cute silent laugh. “Ha Ha, I know, and even the stupid drunk dude pointed it out” Ally just looked up at me and smiled. Can you hear anyone else? she asked. “No just you, it’s kind of funny.”
She smiled. Well, I’m glad you could hear me kick that weirdo off of me. Thank you, she signed again. I smiled “It’s cool, you would have done the same.”
Looking around she got up and edged closer to me being a good foot from my face. This was normal, at least for me, she would do this to everyone, especially when she was little, and she would study their faces. I remember that everyone thought she was trying to kiss them, but she just wanted to see their faces clearly. She normally would just look at my face, examine whatever she does here and there. She stepped back and started to laugh again.
“What?” I said somewhat concerned. She started laughing harder “What?” I said again this time more agitated. She kept lauding for a solid 30 seconds and then finally composed herself enough to sign.
I already know! I just looked at her confused “you know what?” She was finally composed enough to sign a full sentence to me.
I can read your thoughts too, bucko! I’ve been reading your thoughts since we met! I just sat there shocked.
“Ok stop joking that isn’t nice.” No, I’m serious, think of something and I’ll tell you. “Umm ok.” I started to try to think of something really hard, something that she wouldn’t know but I kept thinking about how hungry I was and thinking about Ally’s mom’s pizza.
Pizza, my mom’s in particular. She smiled.
“Ok that doesn’t count, you know I think of pizza when I’m hungry. Ok, tell me something that you heard me say that I never said before.”
“Ok, you’re asking for it” I heard her say. “I just heard you!” I shouted. I heard you again. I know Ally said biting her lip trying not to laugh.
You have a secret Justin Trudeau shrine in your secret stash of pickles in your old tree house that you accidentally built when you thought that houses were not safe on the ground. I only vaguely heard what she said because I was still caught up on that she knew I heard her. “What do you mean you know that I heard you?”
I said starting to freak. Well, I kind of-“Wait how did you know about my shrine? And my Pickles? And my phobia!!!??”
Ally wiped the smile off her face and she grabbed my hand to try to come me down. “It’s ok, it’s ok” I heard her say. “What is going on!” I yelled.
She gave me a hug and I started to calm down. When I finally did calm down she let me go and signed Are you ok? I nodded, “yeah sorry, just a panic attack.”
She smiled at me It’s okay, I’ll explain. She then started to explain to me that ever since she was a young child, she has been always able to read other people’s thoughts. It was kind of a gift and a curse combined. She said that for some reason the closer she gets to someone the more her own thoughts start to be heard by other people. Like the passage from my thoughts to hers, for example, becomes a dual road. You really can only hear my thoughts when I think something urgently or something important right? I nodded. Well, it’s because of the, umm… let’s say filter that I use so you can’t hear my thoughts is momentarily forgotten because I’m panicking about something, so it’s normally the closest person that I am with, that for some reason are connected, they can hear me. It’s weird, I know.” she sighed looking down.
I just smiled, though. “It’s not weird, it’s pretty cool.” Ally smiled Ok now that you know you got to keep it a secret.
“You can tell me in my head if you want,” I smiled “I enjoy hearing your voice.” She just smiled and looked down blushing. Then we heard a click. And then a creak of the door opening and we saw the red haired police officer talking into her phone
“Ok we are done talking with your fellow drunk friends, everything’s under control now, you are now free to leave.” And with that Ally and I got up and went out the door. I was already out the door before I realized Ally wasn’t directly behind me “Gerami!” I heard her say frightened, I turned around just with enough time to see the police officer holding Ally behind her and with a red painted fingernail pointing at what looked to be some kind of secret camera screen.
I was only able to think; They were watching us before a second policeman scooped me up and threw me into the backseat of his police car, and as we drove away all I could see the house door close and hear Ally’s panic begin.
Hey Copper D.W. here,
So I had an interesting thought the other day and I thought you may want to hear about it. I remember a long while aback someone told me that “The thing that makes human kind more superior is not our mental prowess but our understanding that we will eventually die. Humans are the only animal that knows that they are going to eventually die.”
I found this thought quite interesting, because though, I don’t necessarily agree that we are the only species that has an understanding of death, it is interesting to ponder on this idea.
Just the other day I was lying in bed (overthinking in bed, again) and I was thinking about life and death. I have been really into the Broadway Musical Hamilton and I listen to the entire soundtrack over and over again, being on repeat for weeks since my friend introduced it to me. There is a line, well more of a song lyric from Hamilton, the song being ‘Wait for It,’ and the lyrics had got the hamster wheel spinning again, but the lyrics I am most particularly referring to go something like this:
Life doesn’t discriminate,
It takes the Sinners and the Saints,
It takes, and it takes and it takes,
Yet we keep living anyways,
We laugh and we fall and we break and we make out mistakes
And if there’s a reason I’m still alive and all those around me have died,
I’m going to wait for it.
This song, ‘Wait for It’ in Hamilton is such an interesting piece, for in the musical there is this conscience knowing that the main character, Alexander Hamilton will die, yet the story is told anyways, and even a little bit after through his legacy. I find that these ideas, both the song and the quote that someone told me, tie nicely together. I don’t want to dwell on death in itself, the fear of dying or really things like that, but what I do want to focus on is that we do know that eventually, we will die. All the living things around us will die. Everything will eventually die. And I’m not saying that animals don’t have this ability of comprehension for I really have no evidence to prove otherwise, but I do know that humans know this. This is what counts.
I think our knowledge of death, can both make and break us. It can send us in a worried or worse state of fear and anxiety, or it can be something that will push us to make every day count. Of course there is Aways an in-between, a middle ground to say the least but still. This knowledge that death will come to all of us, is a scary thought, but I know many people who have been terminally ill who never take a day for granted for they know that this day may be their last.
I just learned my mother’s good friend has cancer. She was a young mother, healthy, fit, and would put up lemonade stands on her lawn to raise money for cancer. She really was a giver and did her best to do her share in the community. She now has cancer. I used to wonder, “Why do bad things always seem to happen to good people?” and then I realized, these kinds of things happen to everyone, at random. Like in the Lyrics of ‘Wait for It,’ “Life doesn’t discriminate it takes the Sinners and the Saints,” and this is so unbelievable true. There is no discrimination when it comes to things in life you can’t control, be it genes, illnesses, and so forth.
The thing that I find interesting, is this idea of death. Death can seem scary, a large hole of dark abyss and nothingness, but I personally think that it is our awareness of death that makes us want to enjoy life at every moment. If animals truly don’t know they are going to die, they always live life in the moment and enjoy it. As humans who our biggest problems these days are overthinking, maybe this is natures way of having a ‘reset’ button, a ‘reality check’ button, which can bring our heads back down to the Earth to tell us, ‘Just enjoy the moment, for anyway could be your last.’
Hello, Copper D.W here!!
I have a little story to tell, don’t worry it’s a positive one, an epiphany almost. Ok so here’s the story.
I was talking to a really good friend weeks ago, and she has been so amazingly supportive and I seem to never be able to give her enough credit. A while ago we were sitting outside our school and we were talking about things, me with my philosophical questions and occasional awkward humour and with her, talking about her favourite things. We started talking about one of her favourite kinds of TV shows, Anime and I accidentally insulted her in one way or another about her favourite genre. (It’s a genre right?) Either way, she said something that, at the moment I thought just pertained to the situation, which I know realize pertains to everything. She said:”I know that it doesn’t always make sense, but if you look for the good things, it is actually a really good show.”
I wasn’t thinking back then really about this comment, and for almost two weeks I didn’t think twice or even at all about what she said, until now. If you translate some of the words, the idea stays the same but the topic becomes more broad and meaningful. If you change the words from ‘it’ to ‘life’ and ‘show’ to ‘world’ the this is what the message would be: “I know that [life] doesn’t always make sense, but if you look at the good things, it is actually a really good [world].” Ok, so now before you start telling me that you can’t only accept the good and completely ignore the bad, which I know is true, but it is still true the other way around.
Talking to my friend for literally a 20 min conversation, 2 weeks later made me realize that, the world may seem all big and scary, but when you’re down, don’t look at the bad things, look at the good, because it’s the good things that you should really focus on. Of course, this is all in theory because you can never completely ignore that bad, and if you watch the news as much as I do, well then you’ll think that the world is a pretty awful place.
But what I learned in this conversation is that look for happiness in the little things, and that the world seems a little more bearable. I know this seem like a bit of a stretch from the original advice, however, the meaning is generally the same.
So this post is basically a Reminder. The world may seem that it is full of awful and terrible things, but if you look at the little things, little pinches of positivity throughout your day and your life, you can realize, if just for a moment that the world isn’t that bad, and its how you look at the situation where you can really see yourself and your true colours.
“Blue Bird” by; Copper D.W